Tag Archives: Evan Seinfeld

Was Lupe Fuentes Deported?

If you keep up with the latest twitter wars you would have noticed over the weekend that Tera Patrick and her former husband  Evan Seinfeld were having a go at it, yet again.

The interesting part of their little dispute what that Tera Patrick said Lupe Fuentes has been deported and that it was part of public record.

When Tera Patrick tweeted it, I noticed that Lupe Fuentes hasn’t been on streammate for over a week, which for her was rather unusual so I started to wonder if maybe Tera Patrick was right.  Maybe Lupe Fuentes really was deported.

However before I was able to post the story yesterday, something came up so today I checked again and I found out that Lupe Fuentes did do a live show yesterday (July 16th).

So it looks like maybe that story was just that, a story.

Since I can’t find any other sort of information or proof of any kind that Lupe Fuentes was deported, for now we’ll just have to file this one under unconfirmed rumor that at this time doesn’t seem to be all that true.

 

Lupe Fuentes Child Porn Top 10 Scandal of 2011 in Colombia

Despite being mostly ignored by most adult industry media, due to rumored threats and strong arms by powerful industry people, the Lupe Fuentes child porn story turns out to be one of the hottest stories of the year for Colombia … see full list here, ranking #6 and #10 on the list.  It’s impressive to rank in the top 10 for the entire year but to rank TWICE in the top 10 is even more impressive, don’t you think?

#6 – PORN DIRECTOR WHO EXPLOITED COLOMBIAN CHILDREN ARRESTED IN SPAIN

One of the more serious stories on the list is the arrest of Spanish porn director Pablo Lapiedra for running an underage prostitution ring and exploiting a 16-year old Colombian girl in a pornographic film. The film was uploaded to a website where it could be viewed for up to $100. The Spaniard shamelessly falsified documents to make the girls appear older and made them work long hours, but Lapiedra is spending even longer hours in his new place of lodging.

#9 – COLOMBIAN PORN STAR LUPE FUENTES FACES DEPORTATION

Lupe Fuentes, Colombian porn star and wife of director Pablo Lapiedra, faced deportation from her adopted home in the states to Colombia over the same charges as her husband — recruiting minors into porn flicks. The odd couple now have a list of felonies to add to their credentials.

 

 

 

Another Lupe Fuentes Child Porn Alert

Believe it or not, Lupe Fuentes and her child porn scandal is in the news yet again!  It seems this is the story that just won’t go away.  Today the BBC is reporting that Lupe Fuentes and her now ex-husband are still on the run on child porn related charges [source].  Another newspaper said Lupe Fuentes is wanted as well for US immigration violations [source].  They said specifically “Lapiedra’s then-wife, Colombian porn star Lupe Fuentes, is alleged to have recruited the girls and is also wanted on charges of child pornography as well for immigration violations in the U.S.”

Lupe Fuentes is currently married to Tera Patrick’s ex-husband Evan Seinfeld.

But apparently they aren’t looking real hard for Lupe because she performs live from her home almost every single day on Streammate.

So I don’t really get this whole wanted by the government thing because anyone with half a brain knows exactly where she is every single day.  So why not just pick her up then?  I really don’t understand.  People are reporting that she is one of the most wanted women in Europe.  Okay then …. why not pick her up then?  It’s not like you don’t know exactly where she lives!

 

 

Spanish director Pablo Lapiedra on child porn charge

A Spanish court has called for the arrest of film director Pablo Lapiedra after ruling he should be extradited to Colombia on child porn charges.

Police in Colombia began an inquiry after a schoolgirl aged 16 took part in a pornographic video.

The director was detained in March on suspicion of making a pornographic film with minors and falsifying their ages.

He was bailed but failed to turn up for a hearing in Madrid on Tuesday, when he was due to be told of his extradition.

Pablo Lapiedra denies falsifying the girl’s age and says he was unaware she was 16.

The case was brought to the attention of the Colombian authorities when the girl’s schoolteachers in Medellin found out about the film.

Interpol was called in to look into the allegations, which dated back to between December 2007 and January 2008. It issued arrest warrants for Pablo Lapiedra and his wife, who appeared in some of the videos.

They have since divorced.

Little Lupe’s Ex Headed to Columbia to face Child Porn Charges

Pablo Lapiedra is the ex-husband of Lupe Fuentes and he’s been held up in Spain, fighting extradition to Colombia to fight charges on child porn.  Spain how now approved the extradition and he is on his way back to Colombia. [source]

Little Lupe Fuentes however is enjoying life in Los Angeles with her new husband Evan Seinfeld and has yet to be forced to go back, despite having a warrant for her arrest and being called one of the most wanted woman in Europe.   She apparently does weekly live sex shows via streammate as well, with reports of showing no sign of care or concern of her pending legal troubles.

Spain approves extradition of ‘child porn’ director to Colombia

Spanish judges on Wednesday approved the extradition of a porn director wanted in Colombia for making films with children.

The judges said Pablo Lapiedra’s attempt to flee Spain constituted a “de facto removal of breach of Colombian jurisdiction” as they ruled that his case met the requirements of the extradition treaty between the two countries.

However, the final decision on Lapiedra’s extradition will be made by the Spanish government.

The Spanish native is wanted in Colombia for allegedly using underage teenage girls in porn films he made in Medellin.

Police arrested the director in March and he remained in prison until he posted a bail of $135,000 in September.

At an extradition hearing earlier this month, Lapiedra claimed the girls showed him fake ID to prove their age. He also claimed exemption from the terms of the extradition treaty because he is a Spanish citizen.

In August, Interpol issued an arrest warrant for Lapiedra’s Colombian wife Lupe Fuentes on charges of child pornography and forgery in connection with the case.

Pablo Lapiedra fighting extradition to Colombia

CN reports today that the ex-husband who blamed her for faking IDs for the under-aged girls, now says the girls were the ones who used faked IDs and he didn’t know they were fake.  A news source from Spain, something like informativo stelecinoco nacional …. goes on to say that he worked them in slave like conditions for very long hours and almost no pay.

If you haven’t been keeping up with the story here is a quickie summary for you.  Lupe Fuentes was married to this guy Pablo Lapiedra.

She met and married him when she was like 19 in Spain.  She worked for and then later with him on producing porn.  It would be while she was with Pablo that she would develop and play the girl of the underage porn star Little Lupe.  Despite that fact that she was in fact over 18 at the time, she had a youthful look and with pig tails, tween clothing, very light use of makeup and creative camera angles, they made her look 10 to 12 years of age.

This is Lupe Fuentes at about 19 to 20 years of age

After playing Little Lupe for awhile they had some success and decided to recruit more girls to work the web cams for them in Spain.  This is where the problems started.  The charges are that together Lupe Fuentes and her husband at the time Pablo would troll schools in very poor areas of a 3rd world country and trick little girls to do porn for them.  They would make them work long hours and pay them almost nothing for it.

This did this in Colombia.  Pablo would eventually get arrested in Spain and is now fighting extradition back to Colombia.  If he wins then they have to let him go in Spain and that means as long as he never goes back to Colombia or a place that has a better extradition treaty with Colombia he can never have to even face the charges.  Or perhaps he is fighting it to buy enough time of being jail in the preferred Spain so that when he does finally get forced back to Colombia much of his time will already have been served.  Who knows … but anyway … back in the Lupe timeline.  Eventually Lupe Fuentes would tire of playing the little girl role and in defiance get a boob job, put on makeup and run off to the US, divorcing Pablo somewhere in there in the mean time.

Almost immediately she signed on with Teravision and started doing Evan Seinfeld, who at the time was married to Tera Patrick.  They divorced and Tera took back her company.   She would later go on to say Lupe was never ever ever under contract with HER company, despite the fact that they made a movie, sent out months and months of press releases, etc.  Let’s just say it was an ugly divorce between Tera and Evan and move on.

In the mean time Lupe Fuentes moved on and well up in the world and she started shacking up with the rocker who at this point I’m pretty sure has no actual skin left – it’s all inked up.  Even the back of his neck has a major tattoo.

Anywho, Little Lupe would go on to marry Evan Seinfeld but before the joyous news could be shared with the world news broke that Lupe Fuentes was wanted on charges of child pornography and forgery and Tera Patrick became one the happiest ex-wives ever.  Tera Patrick would then spend her time tweeting about child pornography and how wrong it was.

In the mean time two things happened … first Lupe Fuentes signed as a contract star for Wicked Pictures and released a movie called Lolita, about an under-aged porn star.  Next Evan Seinfeld did an interview where he said that basically Tera was just a bitter, jealous hag that he had a hot young wife now and (not exact words this was really just a paraphrase) and that what he loves most about being with Lupe is how she looks 16.  16 being underage so ya, all of the sudden Evan looked like a child porn pimping perv himself, despite the fact that he had no involvement in any of that mess back in South America.

They would stop tweeting and lay low for months.  During this time all kinds of crazy rumors came about.  Turns out most of them were untrue.  Any stories that did leak out, Evan would call in favors to get them pulled.  Then one day the news broke than Lupe Fuentes is the most wanted woman in Europe and as then we found out she wasn’t really hiding at all.  She’s been in contact with the FBI all this time, they’ve been to her house many times – many many many people have seen her and she is at the residence that is the ID on her driver’s license so it’s not that they don’t know where she is.  So she started doing live cam shows again.  Working almost every day doing live shows.

And that’s where we are in the story pretty much.

[source] Porn director wanted for extradition to Colombia on charges of using children in his films has claimed the girls showed fake documents to prove they were of legal age.

In an extradition hearing, defense lawyers for Pablo Lapiedra told a Spanish court the director never thought he was committing a crime and had always acted in an “open and transparent manner.”

Investigators in the case have claimed it was Lapiedra himself who provided the girls with false identification documents.

Lapiedra is fighting extradition to Colombia, where he could face 8-12 years in prison, on the grounds that he is a Spanish citizen and therefore exempt under the terms of the two countries extradition treaty.

Prosecutors argued that the case meets the terms of the treaty and Lapiedra should be judged in the country where the alleged crimes took place.  Spanish police arrested the director on in Spain in March this year following an Interpol investigation.  He is accused of using minors in a porn movie filmed in Medellin. Lapiedra’s estranged wife, Lupe Fuentes, is also wanted on charges of child pornography and forgery.

[source] The defense of the porn film director Pablo Lapiedra, claimed by Colombia for allegedly filming pornographic movies and hang lower then the Internet, said today in the National Court, who thought the actress was more than 18 years and showed him to complete his contract an identity document which established the age of majority.

The defense of the porn film director Pablo Lapiedra, claimed by Colombia for allegedly filming pornographic movies and hang lower then the Internet, said today in the National Court, who thought the actress was more than 18 years and showed him to complete his contract an identity document which established the age of majority.

The director, who has refused to be extradited to South American country, is free on bail pending the High Court decision on his extradition. Colombia accused of committing a minor crime of pornography punishable by 8 to 12 years in prison.

The offense is the equivalent in Spain child pornography, punishable by 5 years in prison that can reach 9 if the court contemplates degrading or abusive character in the events judged.

The defendant’s lawyer, Jose Luis Fuertes, defended in an oral hearing Tuesday before the Third Section of the Criminal Division, who never thought they could Lapiedra be committing a crime and stressed that, in fact, “acted an open and transparent “to the point of replacing the pornographic video on his website, where he was identified with all kinds of data.

He stressed further that his client was not involved in the process of falsification of ID presented by the minor, so I never questioned the validity of the decree that was shown.

Strong has shown that the delivery to the Colombian authorities of his client breach the extradition treaty between the two countries since the agreement does not include the extradition of nationals.

He also highlighted that the Court of Instruction No. 5, Barcelona has also launched an investigation into these same facts, has been dismissed on a provisional basis pending the delivery by Colombia, data on the alleged commission of crime.

“My client prefers to be tried in Spain, especially in a case as sensitive as this,” the lawyer stressed.

Meanwhile, the prosecutor of the Audiencia Nacional, Carlos Bautista, has asked the judges of the Third that guarantee the delivery and has defended the validity of the Treaty. In his view the prosecution, there is evidence pointing to the involvement of the principal in the crime of which he is charged.

ORDER OF INTERPOL

Lapiedra was arrested on 17 March in the Catalan capital by officers from the Technological Research of the National Police pursuant to a warrant issued by Interpol.

The arrestee is suspected of pedophile videos recorded using children, which changed the age to simulate with false documents that were older, according to the National Police. The agents tracked the recordings in collaboration with the authorities of Colombia, which made the videos, which were sold worldwide through the network.

Colombian authorities are investigating the director since 2008, after the rector of an institute of Medellín filed a complaint because a student appeared in a pornographic video. After following the track of this recording reached Lapiedra and his wife, who works as a porn actress. Then found that both live in Madrid and she appeared in some films.

One of the alleged victims said in his statement recorded movies for hours, from eight o’clock to seven o’clock in the afternoon, we paid 700 euros and assured him that the videos would not be distributed in Colombia.

SunLust Does Teen Sex

Sunny Leone recently launched her own line of movies much like Jenna Jameson’s Club Jenna brand. The only difference is, Sunny Leone seems to have hired a group of people that don’t really give two shits about quality.  Jenna Jameson be one crazy bitch but fuck at least she picked hot chicks to be in her fucking movies.

Her latest release Teen Sex is a prime example of that.  She claims she directed the movie which is really nothing more than a collection of gonzo like scenes of which she claims to direct, did she really or did the just put her name on it?  Who knows.

That however isn’t really my bitch.  The first thing that catches my attention in this fiasco of a movie is Ron Jeremy’s fat ass fucks some chick with his shirt on.  He couldn’t really take his fucking shirt off?

Next I seen Evan Seinfeld.  He’s well know for all of his tats and as such his Teravision movies starting selling bad.  I mean who the fuck wants to see that?  Well in this movie he has even more tats that before.  The man has very little actual skin left on body.  It’s almost entirely covered in ink now, including his hands.  You can’t even watch the part of the trailer with him in it, his ink is just far to distracting.

You would think someone like Sunny Leone would be hand picking her cast with pretty girls and some decent looking guys.  But instead it looks like they’ve opted to go the budget porn route with some very bottom of the scale female talent as well.

click here to see the trailer

Teen Sex starring Dakoda Brooks, Melissa Matthews, Sindee Jennings, Kaci Star, Bella Cole, Derrick Pierce, Tommy Gunn, Ron Jeremy and Spyder Jonez.  Watch as these sexy young teens get fucked by guys that know what they want. These teen sluts love to get pounded by experienced cocks. They just keep screaming for more and more.


Tera Patrick Slams Evan Seinfeld and Lupe Fuentes

Tera Patrick has decided to go for the juggler in her recent twitter attacks on her ex-husband, Evan Seinfeld and his new wife Lupe Fuentes aka Zuleidy, who faces potential legal troubles in her home country of Colombia.

Tera Patrick let out some tweets today that say things like “I wonder if the Orange County jail has a beach view…… #giggling” and “Now that your only meal ticket is deported can you please STOP suing me for alimony!!! Maybe get a life , job , skills? LMAO“.

Prior to her anti Evan and Lupe Fuentes tweets today, she had been making a lot of subtle little knocks by tweeting a lot of anti-child pornography messages. Although on the surface they didn’t seem to be an attack on her ex, anyone familiar with their situation knew it was a message she was trying to send loud and clear.  The only other time besides today she really spoke directly and open about Lupe Fuentes was just after the original story broke back in March.

 

Just so you can keep up to date here are links to various parts of the story that we have covered here so far in regards to the Lupe Fuentes story.

 

A Lupe Fuentes Update

Since the shit hit the fan last week no real news about anything has been given. Sure there have been rumors flying. People are saying Lupe Fuentes has fled while others say they found child porn in her house where she was living with Evan Seinfeld. There are so many fucking stories out there, who knows which ones are fucking true and which ones people have pulled out of their ass.

There is however one real update. One of the foreign press sources that originally broke the story has posted an update from 03/28/2011. Here is the Google translated version below.   To sum it up, Lupe’s husband is saying he didn’t do it and the judge is saying fuck that he’s a flight risk and we want him extradited back to Colombia.  They are saying it may take up to 30 days to finalize all the required paperwork.  Lupe’s husband is facing 8 to 12 years in prison.

The judge sent to prison for porn director accused of prostituting children

Colombia reclama la extradición de Pablo Lapiedra por grabar películas con una chica de 16 años a la que reclutó en Medellín Colombia is demanding the extradition of Pablo Lapiedra to record movies with a girl of 16 years who enrolled in Medellin

The National Court Judge Pablo Ruz has ratified today the arrest warrant which agreed last week to the director and producer Pablo Lapiedra porn, arrested on March 17 in Barcelona accused prostitute and burn to lower selling Colombian films through their websites .

The judge has taken this decision pending the Colombian authorities, demanding the surrender of Lapiedra because that country’s lower-submit the necessary documents to formalize the request for extradition, for which they have 30 days in term Legal sources have reported.

In a ruling made public Monday, the judge stressed the “seriousness” of the crime charged to Lapiedra, since pornography is punishable under the Penal Code Colombian sentences of between 8 and 12 years in prison. The offense is the equivalent in Spain child pornography, punishable by 5 years imprisonment which may reach nine if the court provides degrading or humiliating character of the facts brought to justice.

Flight risk

Ruz justify the continued detention of the accused argued that despite having Spanish nationality and work and family roots, there is also “a risk of removal from the action of justice.”

The court in Instruction No. 22, Barcelona on Monday ordered the imprisonment of Lapiedra after he was arrested on 17 March in the Catalan capital by members of the Brigade of Technological Research of the National Police to comply with an order issued by Interpol.

In his appearance before Ruz, Lapiedra, 36, has denied involvement in the crimes alleged against him, but the judge considers that these allegations “shall be subject to appropriate debate and deliberation” when it begins to process the extradition procedure at which time the defendant will be taken back to him to ask whether or not to be delivered to Colombia.

To refuse to surrender, the judge will refer the case to the Criminal Division of the High Court in a hearing to examine whether or not to be extradited. No obstante, la última palabra, independientemente de lo que la Audiencia Nacional decida, corresponde siempre al Consejo de Ministros. However, the last word, regardless of what the High Court decides, it is always the Council of Ministers.

700 euros and false promises

The arrestee is suspected of pedophile videos recorded using children, which they distort their age with false papers to pretend they were older, according to the National Police. Los agentes rastrearon las grabaciones en colaboración con las autoridades de Colombia, país en el que se realizaron los vídeos, que fueron vendidos en todo el mundo a través de la red. The agents tracked the recordings in collaboration with the authorities of Colombia, which made the videos, which were sold throughout the world through the network.

The Colombian authorities investigating the director since 2008, after the rector of an institute of Medellín filed a complaint because a student appeared in a pornographic video. Tras seguir la pista de esta grabación llegaron hasta Lapiedra y su mujer, que trabaja como ‘pornstar’. After keeping track of this recording came to Lapiedra and his wife, who works as a ‘pornstar’. Después constataron que ambos residen en Madrid y que ella aparecía en algunas de las filmaciones. Later found that both reside in Madrid and she appeared in some of the filming.

One of the alleged victims said in his statement recorded movies for hours, from eight o’clock to seven o’clock in the afternoon, we paid 700 euros and was assured that the videos would not be distributed in Colombia.

Tera Patrick Speaks

Nobody has really focused much attention on the ex-wife in all of this icky mess with Lupe Fuentes … and by ex-wife I mean Tera Patrick.   She was married to Evan Seinfeld and upon their breaking up ended up hooking up with Lupe Fuentes.

But if we read her tweets we learn that she seems to be happy with her new life as a “former” porn star.  She is doing a shoot for FHM and Maxim.  That’s pretty damn impressive.  But one can’t help but wonder what she thinks about her ex-husband’s hot little mess and the rumors that this one time associate could even be facing the death penalty in her home country?

I noticed in her tweets (@Tera1Patrick) she says how there is so much she wishes she could tell but won’t because she’s better than that.   She does make an important note that Teravision is HER company, always was and is quick to disassociate herself with Evan and Little Lupe.

Who is Lupe Fuentes?

I admit, I was hoping our resident ass hole will post this story because I don’t like stories with so much negativity involved.  I hate being a bad guy.   I’m not saying it is the right way to be, but I am who I am.  That being said, we can’t not report on only the most important story going on in the adult industry right now.

Lupe Fuentes came onto the scene as Little Lupe, a performer who was made up to appear to be an underage child.  They called it fantasy sex or exploitative exploration.  This new genre of teen sex rubbed a lot of people the wrong way.  It wasn’t really child porn because the performers were really over 18, even if they pretended not to be.  Eventually Little Lupe saved up her money and got a boob job and rumored to have said she got the boob job so that she didn’t have to do that kind of work anymore.

Once she got her boob job and started wearing makeup her entire look changed.  She no longer looked like a 12 year old girl but instead like a really hot barely legal teen.  She was admittedly a really pretty girl.  She quickly hooked up with Evan Seinfeld as his marriage with Tera Patrick fell apart.  Soon after he helped her negotiate a contract with Wicked Pictures.  Soon after that she was named a Fleshlight girl and it was said she had the popular selling Fleshlight, beating out Digital Playground starlet Stoya who previously held the title as the best selling Fleshlight.

Last night her past caught up with her.  What was her past might you ask?  Well apparently she married a man and at least according to one news source the pair would troll schools and trick little girls to do porn and work under slave like conditions, in some cases working 12 hours a day on the set.  Lupe’s husband (not Evan Seinfeld) was caught last night and is currently fighting his extradition back to Columbia out of fear they will kill him.  Back here in the US the Feds are closing in on Lupe Fuentes.

Some people are saying she is already in custody while others say she is on the run, possibly to Mexico where it is known that they don’t tend to approve extradition to any country where the death penalty may be on the table.

Again these are all just rumors right now.  Rumors that every gossip and industry blog is reporting on as fast as they can type.  Here are a few links from from other industry blogs about the Lupe story.  As you can see there are many.

Adult FYI has a long version of the story as well

Tuesday’s Tomahawk Chops – The Little Lupe Kiddie Porn Controversy

Gene Ross from www.adultfyi.com writes: What’s in a name, really? There’s probably millions of dames out there with the handle, Zuleidy Piedrahita. For Pete’s sake, it’s as common as Almadea Przyborowski.

Hollywood actresses, along with their bust lines, change their nationality all the time. Bombshell Jayne Mansfield was even considering a name change to Zuleidy Piedrahita when she was thinking of going Colombian. So was Ava Gardner. [Why do you think she and Sinatra fought so much?]

So we must assume, immediately, that Little Latin Lupe Loo Fuentes, who’s real name, coincidentally, is also Zuleidy Piedrahita, isn’t the same woman wanted all over Interpol. Alleged participation in a kiddie porn ring, the boys with the badges and accents are saying. Plausible explanations and deniability, one would assume, will be the order of the day.

Still, it looks as though the Wizard of Oz porn parody starring Little Lupe, not to be confused with the horse running in the Fifth at Santa Anita, might have to be put on hold for awhile while her people busy up with damage control. Another possibility is the re-casting of the head munchkin.

But even the mere thought of Little Lupe, often mistaken for a South American Verne Troyer lookalike, being involved in anything shady, must be perished immediately.

There’s too much at stake. A successful I Love Lupe website. [Lucille Ball must be rolling over in her grave.]

There’s also weekly Webcam shows. PR representation that must cost her a bundle each month. Regular appearances on the Howard Stern Show in which the Fifty-ish Stern, like a St. Bernard on cue, requisitely slobbers over Lupe’s youth and vitality. A Wicked contract. Plus an undying love for Evan Seinfeld who apparently left the sultry Tera Patrick for someone his height was more comfortable dealing with in those many red carpet photo ops.

As always, the presumed innocent tenet must prevail. And the fact that Little Latin Lupe Loo manufactures her allure based on the forbidden rites of youthful panties and just a playful hint of talcum powder and baby rattles must be considered another unfortunate coincidence.

And, please, don’t even consider as facts-in-evidence the time when Fuentes and Seinfeld were being sued in a copyright infringement case involving the “Little Lupe” name. Something about 50 stolen videos and false copyright information. Who ya gonna believe? Lawyers?

At 4’9″, Lupe, who’s as diminutive as a Puerto Rican Shirley Temple, is little all by herself. She needs no one’s help to come up with the uninspired  and too obvious trademark, “Little”. Little Richard got away with it for years and no one fucked with him, right?

As it is, today’s successful people are invariably targets, and what really put the bullet in Lupe’s popularity ass and shot her up the charts was one of those stories, which, in its reconsideration, kinda makes you wonder.

Let’s go back to April of 2010 when Little Latin Lupe made a surprise appearance in a Puerto Rican courtroom. It had nothing to do with a greaseball named Chico, a knife fight between The Sharks and The Jets or Lupe playing Maria in the porn version of West Side Story.

On trial was Carlos Simon-Timmerman, not to be confused with Carly Simon. From New York, Carlos is a fan of Lupe’s. He was visiting his home country of Venezuela and was excited, as you might be, to find a Lupe compilation DVD at a local flea market containing her early movies.

Upon returning home on August 11, 2009, on a stopover in San Juan, Puerto Rico, Carlos, not to be confused with Carlos the Jackal, was detained. The spoil sports in US customs then proceeded to seize Carlos’ DVDs including, “Little Lupe the Innocent: Don’t Be Fooled By Her Baby Face.” Talk about taking a title on face value and jumping to conclusions.

Assuming words like “baby face” and “innocent” were kiddie porn code words for underage cock sucking, government officials proceeded to arrest Carlos. They charged him with illegal possession and transportation of images involving minors engaged in sexually explicit conduct.

After spending nearly two months in jail and with a 20-year maximum prison sentence staring him in the face, Carlos looked like he was heading for Pedoville- a special prison manned by sneering big-bellied Turkish wrestlers who know how to handle perverts who like the young stuff. Remember the two morons who prosecuted the Stagliano case and tripped all over their high heels in doing so? Same thing happened here, sort of.

A Special Agent of Immigration and Customs Enforcement that deals with child porn and child exploitation cases, testified that Lupe was “definitely” under the age of 18.  The government then presented the “expert” testimony of a pediatrician. He also assured the courts that Little Lupe was “positively” underage. The only thing missing was the birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese with the incriminating Polaroids.

Things were looking pretty bleak indeed for Charlie without some way of finding production dates for Lupe’s videos and photos to dishonor the prosecution. Via MySpace, his legal team managed to contact Lupe hoping her testimony would help. Lupe immediately agreed and flew to Puerto Rico on April 6th, 2010 to appear in court the next day to state her case.

She also presented, as evidence, copies of documents showing her birth date, and dates of production for the Little Lupe DVD. A letter of endorsement from Gary Coleman also helped.

Armed to the gills, Lupe, thus, strutted into the courtroom looking as regal as a Mickey Rooney mail order bride.

“It was like a courtroom drama in a movie,” recalled Assistant Public Defender Héctor L. Ramos-Vega.

“When Lupe walked in [reportedly to the tune of Elton John’s Tiny Dancer], she looked like she was seven feet tall. She owned the room, and she immediately won the jury over,”  said Ramos-Vega.

The prosecution, recognizing that its case had been completely discredited by a woman under the height of 5 feet, moved to dismiss all of the charges against Carlos, not to be confused with Charlie Sheen.

“Lupe is a humanitarian who cares about justice, and cares about her fans,” Ramos-Vega would also say glowingly on her behalf.

On her first Howard Stern show appearance, Stern brought up the trial and said he was nervous having Lupe on because he might go to jail. One also assumes Stern was being facetious with his barrage of incessant 12 year-old comments.

Lupe mentioned that she grew up in Madrid, Spain and that her pussy is like a machine to make money. Imagine making that amusing comment to your date’s parents when they’re giving you the third degree.

Stern then asked if Lupe’s parents are mad at her for what she does. Lupe, thus dispelling rumors that she had been found at the bottom of a cereal box, said her folks know what she does and love her just the same although they don’t like it.

For the record, Lupe started having sex at the age of 13 when she began sucking cock and apparently lost her virginity on the floor of a dirty gas station bathroom while retrieving a Maxipad.

Not fully versed in the travel etiquette of the Continental United States, Lupe once had sex on an airplane, got caught, and had the police waiting for her in Austin, Texas when the plane landed. According to Lupe, she ran away and didn’t get arrested. Of course that could all change with these latest developments.

Howard asked Lupe if she knew any celebrities besides Leonardo DiCaprio. Attracted to men generally taller than her, Little Lupe said she met Kid Rock but didn’t sleep with him, noting that The Kid, however, loves to fuck and is attracted to women generally shorter than him. Stern wondered if she ever blew George Clooney, to which Lupe said she met him but nothing happened.

Also revealed in the Stern interview is Lupe’s profuse dislike for Gypsies and Arabs. Lupe explained that she doesn’t like Gypsies because they steal, don’t work and give bad Tarot Card readings. But she didn’t seem to have much of a reason for hating the Arabs other than their having big noses that scare her.

Asked how she met Evan Seinfeld, Lupe said it was on Myspace, although she’d later admit in private conversation she was under the impression it was Jerry Seinfeld.

In recent days, Lupe’s sterling reputation has been dragged through the mud when shit hit the bullring in Spain. Police arrested her ex-husband, director Pablo Lapiedra, also known as the porno Pedro Almodovar.

The charges against Lapiedra, a Spanish native, were prostituting, recording Colombian children in porno films and smelling their ankle socks. Lapiedra then sold the movies.

According to the story, the girls were tricked by Lapiedra into thinking they were casting for a mainstream film about sucking cock. Lapiedra also provided them false documentation to appear older. The investigation began in late 2008 after the Federal Bureau of Technical Investigation (BIT) of the Spanish police, in collaboration with Colombia’s National Police and Interpol, detected a teenage prostitute network operating in Latin American countries.

The tip-off came from the head of a Medellin institute who was informed by some students that a fellow student was starring in a porn film. In the film, the 16 year old girl was molested by two men as well as the cameraman and an unemployed bullfighter. The film was placed on an internet site where it could be downloaded for up to $100. Early investigations showed the internet site was registered under Lupe Fuentes using her married name Zuleidy Piedrahita.

News reports claim Interpol has issued an international arrest warrant for Fuentes. The question at this juncture might ask: Was Fuentes personally involved in this sordid mess, or was Lapiedra merely telling wild stories about her in his unabiding jealousy of Evan Seinfeld?

Which ever way, we assume this is all just a giant misunderstanding and that the authorities are really seeking the notorious cross-dresser Pedro Fuentes who’s played Major League baseball under a number of aliases and has frequented Cuban gay bars in Miami.