Review of Teagan Presley’s The S!X

I’ll be honest with you, I chose to review Teagan Presley’s new movie The S!X based solely off of the box cover.  There are just so many new movies out anymore it is hard to decide which one may be worth watching.

The first scene featured Teagan Presley with Alexis Texas.  Talk about an industry darling.  People lately seem to be just obsessed with her.  I think she is the porno industries answer to Kim Kardashian.  I personally think I prefer Alexis Texas over Kim Kardashian but that’s another story for another day.

Actually what I liked about this movie was the first thing you see not only in this scene but in every scene.  They all have this sexy, erotic openings.  It’s very reminiscence of those Taylor Rain movies from years ago.  Needless to say, I like those kind of fantasy opening sequences a lot.

The next scene is with Bobbi Starr and Spanish stud Toni Ribas.  I can honestly say I don’t think I’ve ever met a straight man who spells his name Toni instead of Tony.  Toni is typically a more feminine spelling.  I don’t know why but I find it very strange.

I kinda figured he was one of those gay/bi cross over stars you’ve been hearing about so much lately but after looking into it some, turns out I was wrong.  He just spells his name weird.  He’s very much a straight male and in fact, he’s appeared in over 500 scenes in the last 10 years.  That means he’s banged more girls in the last decade that most men will even dream of being with in an entire lifetime.

So back to the scene.  The two had rather good chemistry.  Lots of heat and passion.  They almost seem to go out of their way to make this movie more attractive to couples with extra affection and kissing.

The next scene features Andy San Dimas and the very sexy Rocco Reed.  You could almost not fuck this scene up.  Rocco Reed is so attractive, is there really anything he could do wrong?

The next scene also comes with one of those fantasy, sexy and erotic opening sequences.  The scene is with Asa Akira and Evan Stone.  Evan Stone is a very powerful male performer.  He’s extremely good looking, that could easily be confused with the male models on the cover of those romance novels, so I was really looking forward to this scene but to be honest I wasn’t impressed.  I don’t know what it is but I’m just really not a fan of Asa Akira.  She wasn’t really into it.  She just seemed so fake to me for some reason.  Her fakeness really distracted me and kept me from truly enjoying the scene.

The last scene features Lexi Belle and Mr. Pete.  The passion in this scene was wrong but the performers seemed rather out of place among a cast of what could easily be confused super models.  You have all these chiseled males and super hot females and then the last two.  They are okay, rather decent looking but by no means ugly just not in the same caliber of the other performers.

Overall I rated the movie very well.  I think Adam and Eve did a great job adding little touches to make the movie more couples friendly, despite it being in the gonzo / all-sex category.  For that I gave the big credit.

I liked the movie a lot.  I liked Teagan Presley and Alexis Texas more than probably anything.   So if you are looking for a good movie to watch, this is probably one you want to check out.

 

 

Movie Review for Stroke It

When a friend of mine called to say a movie that I had wanted to review for awhile now was about to be on Playboy TV I got so excited.  I love Vivid movies, they are normally so high quality.  The movie I was going to be reviewing is called Stroke It starring Meggan Mallone.  This was one of the first movies she did for Vivid and it was filmed prior to her boob job so she still had the very tiny little breasts.  Playboy TV tends to rename the Vivid movies they show for some weird reason so they were calling the movie “All the the Wrist”.  By the name(s) of the movie one would tend to think this is one of those handjob gonzo titles but in fact that wasn’t the case.  I think it was just some random name they came up with that was remotely relating to sex because the movie wasn’t about hand jobs at all.

The movie was directed by B. Skow who years later Meggan Mallone would go on to move in with, leave porn for, get engaged to and eventually have his child.  They call this movie an “all sex” or “gonzo” film.  This is basically just another way of saying this movie isn’t a feature film.  It’s just a collection of sex scenes typically of a similar nature.  There is no pretense of a story, instead these kind of movies have themes like all big boobs or all blondes.

I want to say that I am normally a huge fan of Vivid movies.  In fact, they have until recently been some of my favorite adult films.

This movie was a sad, sad attempt at a Vivid film.  It wasn’t even that hot in terms of sex, with the exception of Meggan’s sex sscenes the rest was just really odd and uninteresting.   In one scene there was no sex at all.  It was a girl in the shower giving us a close up look at her shaving her hairy pussy.  Who the hell thought it would be sexy to watch a girl shave her hairy pussy?  It was un-sexy, and well downright nasty.  Not my cup of tea to say the least.

There is a scene in the movie with Evan Stone who I normally really like but this scene was really badly done.  The directing in this thing left me going WTH?  It was cheesy and forced.  I didn’t like it at all.

Minus the 3 Meggan Mallone scenes, this movie was a total and complete waste.  I was highly disappointed.  It was like they gave some guy they just met off of the street a camera and said go for it!  His lack of experience clearly came through in the way he shot the girls.

I love Meggan Mallone.  I love Vivid movies but I have to say what I don’t love is this movie.   If I had to give it a rating I guess I would give it a 3 out of 10.  If you care to see the movie for yourself you can watch Stroke It online on the official Vivid website.

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Review for Bottom Line 1

I believe that if you try hard enough there is something good you can say about everything.  I’ve lived my entire life by this theory.  Let’s just say that for this review, I really had to try very hard to find something nice to say about the movie Sean Michaels’ Bottom Line from Evil Angel.  I’m used to movies being at least 5 scenes long.  I don’t really know who set that standard but it almost seems as if I’m cheated if there aren’t at least 5 scenes, even if the overall number of minutes are the same.  I don’t know why, but having less than 5 scenes in a movie is something that has just always bothered me.

In this movie Sean Michaels has 4 different sexual encounters and each one is a different scene.  The first girl up to bat is Kelly Divine.  I’ve always thought Kelly Divine was pretty.  I like her a lot but I was really to distracted to notice her good looks but the horrible music she is dancing to in this scene.  Eventually Sean comes in, they have sex and that is that.  I really found myself fast forwarding through the sex in this scene.  It’s never a good thing when a consumer is so uninterested in the sex between two people in a porno that they fast forward through it.

The next scene caught my attention a little more.  It was a threeway which included Alana Evans and Flower Tucci.  The sex was a little better in this scene but still seemed so forced and awkward.  I hate to say it but it was very evident that these girls were paid to do a job and they weren’t patriotically happy about being there.  There were moments in this scene that weren’t bad, especially with the dildo involved but it’s hard for me to get into a scene when the performers themselves are not so into it.

The next scene features Mellanie Monroe. This scene was confusing to me.  By her looks I wasn’t sure if she was some hooker he paid to come to his house to fuck him or some chick he already knew.   There is a great tease scene between the two that is pretty hot.  What was really strange about this scene was the very end.  Basically instead of coming on her ass or tits or even on her face like most guys do, he came in her hand.

The last scene features Liz Black who calls up Sean for a little fun.  This time he goes to her for the sex.  This is sort of a setup for a husband to get to watch another man fucking his wife.  The energy was pretty decent in this scene but I would have liked to see the 3rd man actually get more into it than he did.  Just jerking off watching some man do your wife isn’t that hot to me.

The extras in the movie were almost non existent.  There was some photo galleries and I think 3 trailers for other movies.  Color me so not impressed.

Overall I would have to say this is probably not a movie you really want to waste much money on.  It’s in the gonzo category and if that is your thing, there are far, far better ones that you could watch instead.

Review for Hocus Pocus XXX

The powers that be sent me 6 more movies to review for this site, one of them really had my attention because for years I’ve watched the Bette Midler Halloween classic Hocus Pocus.  I love the campy feeling of the movie.  It’s almost like they went out of their way to make obvious mistakes in making the film.  But as any of their millions of devoted fans of the movie will tell you, that is really part of the charm of the movie.

So when I heard that there was a pornographic parody being made of the movie, of course I had to take a moment to check it out.

In all honesty, I was on another review website and seen their comments about it.   The reviewer talked about how great the sex was, but was really harsh on it for the very thing that made the original movie great.   He hated the low budget, campy feeling of the movie.  Clearly the reviewer never sat down on the 13th nights of Halloween before and seen  Sarah Jessica Parker jump up and down saying Amuck! Amuck! Amuck!

The acting in the original Hocus Pocus was so atrocious that it because a big part of how great the movie is.  The movie was never meant to be an oscar winning
Now back to the parody.  Casting wise they did a great job.  Bette Midler’s role was played by Audrey Hollander.   There aren’t really that many red headed porn stars but out of the few there are, I think they made the best casting choice.

When it comes to the Sarah Jessica Parker character, there could have been no other choice than to cast Nikki Benz.    They look so much alike and have very similar mannerisms.  A few months ago I seen a side by side photo comparison that the producer had posted on Adult DVD Talk but when I started working on this review I couldn’t seem to find the image anymore so instead I thought I would create my own comparing the stars of the parody to the original.

The movie opens up with a 6 girl orgy.  Later on in the movie you learn that the witch sisters draw their magical powers from sexual energy and would eventually be found guilty and put to death for corrupting the local townswoman.  That apparently is what we are seeing in this first scene.

I read once from something the producer said about the movie some time ago that this scene originally lasted over an hour but in editing is was brought down to just over 24 minutes.  That seems like a lot of cut footage.  I think it would have been nice to had at least a few more minutes of Madelyn Marie with Audrey Hollander.

Like in the original movie, they make a few obvious mistakes but it wouldn’t be true to the original if they didn’t.

In the next scene it brings us into modern day times.  The witches house is now a haunted museum and every year they throw a Halloween party.  Employees of the museum are preparing for the party when they get sidetracked by sex.  The threesome involves McKenzee Miles, her boyfriend and Amia Miley.

I first seen Amia Miley on some teen website with her body all greased up.  I watched her scene and immediately fell in love with her.  She has this very cutesy look about her but has a mouth like a sailer.  In this scene with McKenzee Miles she doesn’t disappoint.  Half way through the scene there is some smoke in the corner and through some great looking special effects, especially for a porno, a woman starts to appear.  I wasn’t quite sure who the person was at first but later on I found out her name is Sea J. Raw.  The other three don’t seem to notice the person is there.  I took me awhile to realize it, but it turns out that Sea J. Raw was actually not there, she was a ghost.  I think she was meant to be the ghost that was causing the other three to get into the threesome in the first place.  Sea J. Raw plays with herself and eventually a vibe magically appears.  She then uses that vibe to fuck herself in the ass.  She was so hot, I actually had forgotten about the threesome going on in the scene.  But not to be outdone in terms of what was hot the male in the scene stacked his two females one on top of the other, to have sex with them.  That was so hot.

In the next few scenes you get to see the now dead witch sisters be brought back to life and go off on their adventure to find a virgin to draw enough power from the virgin’s sexual energy to let them live beyond just Halloween night.  The next three sex scenes involve each of the three witches having sex with different men that they’ve picked up at the party going on at their house.  Turns out they weren’t able to find a virgin but were about to keep trying when they meet up with a very large breasted blonde who wanted to help.  She knew of a virgin who has wanted to fuck her for awhile.

What they did right — I guess the best way to put it is that the sex was magical.  Between the heated threeway scene with Amia Miley to Audrey Hollander’s anal sex scene.  I like that the didn’t try and match the original movie word for word but that they stuck with what was great about it, the campy feeling.  It worked for the original and for this version as well.

I think they did a great job with all the extras including several cast interviews and behind the scenes chatter.  A lot of the lower budget movies tend to pass on this extra footage and I think that’s a mistake.  How hard is it to take a few minutes to ask the cast some questions.  I’m glad they did this.  It was great listening to Eva Angelina talk about wearing her glasses to catch a cum shot.

The costumes were hot.  I know that most men don’t watch porn to see what the girls are wearing but as a female, I can’t help it.  That kind of thing matters to me.

What they did wrong — I would have liked to see a longer version of the first scene in the movie, the 6 girl orgy.   I think if they had over an hour footage actually shot, I would have liked to see more Madelyn Marie.  Surely somewhere in that 1 hour of extra lost footage, she was in some of it.

I liked the bonus dance scene they did with the fog. I  thought it was very sexy and erotic.  I really liked the song attached to it.  I don’t know who sings it but is great.  I had it stuck in my head for days and it was the perfect match for the dance number the three main stars of the movie did.  But what I don’t understand is why they didn’t include more bonus footage or bonus scenes from the many other movies that Cezar Capone had previously done.  I’m a big fan of the extras and bonuses on the dvd.  But since they provided some other great bonuses, it’s not that big of a deal.

In conclusion — In the end the movie parody or not it is still a porno and people watching it want to see one great thing and that is the sex so really the only thing that really matters is how hot the sex was.  In all the movie had 6 sex scenes, all of which where great.  Some where better than others, but isn’t that always the case?

Review for My Virtual Twins

Someone I work with was doing some work on a website and one of the movies in the site featured identical twins Misha and Sasha.  Turns out there was hot twins in the business before Vivid signed The Love Twins.  These twins are from Russia and first came to be known by the name The Sin Twins as originally they were signed by Sin City Films.  Then after making only a tiny number of movies with Sin City, maybe 3 or 4 at best, they left and signed with Anarchy Films.  With Anarchy they did about 10 maybe 12 movies, one of which was called My Virtual Twins.

You may be asking yourself why I am reviewing a movie that came out in 2003 but to be honest it really is a great watch still years later.  The twins that star in the movie didn’t get any less hotter just because a few years have passed.

The movie is broken up into three categories for the viewer to choose from, foreplay, sweet and nasty.   After selecting foreplay you are presented with the option of tits, ass, pussy, dildo, and bj.  These videos are more teasers than anything.  The tits menu gets you a video of the girls tits, where the ass menu as you might expect will get you shots of the girls asses.

The sweet menu gets you the option of seeing the twins do doggie, reverse cowgirl, missionary, cowgirl or to go directly to the cum shot.

If you chose the nasty menu you get the same options as sweet, only they are a little more hardcore.  The cum scene then offers you two options of cum inside of me or cum on me.

The girls have great, rock hard bodies and they have a lot of energy in their sex scenes.  They aren’t at all shy, and it comes through in their performances.  My favorite part was the reverse cowgirl.  I don’t know which twin it was because I quite honestly can’t tell them apart, but damn one of them can sure ride a cock and look amazing doing it.  Her super flat, well toned stomach, her great tits.  It’s just an all around great scene.

What they did right — They made a movie with two very hot identical twin sisters.  How can that alone not be a plus of any movie?  Add to the fact that the girls have a great, outgoing personality that comes through in the scenes they do and it’s even better.

I love the bonus interview they did with Misha and Sasha at the end of the movie.  It also included a almost 10 minute behind the scenes clip of the Twins in London.  I’m a huge fan of extras when it comes to DVDs, so these were a really nice plus for me.

As far as the movie goes, I really can’t complain.  The girls had a lot of energy in their sex scenes.   The girls are very hot and their accents are beyond adorable.

What they did wrong — Minus the interview and BTS clip they did with Misha and Sasha, which was great mind you, the DVD really lacked on any bonuses or extras.  It has the standard photo slideshow, and a a few movie trailers for some of the other Anarchy titles but that was really it.    Would it have been so hard to throw in a biography of these girls or at least some kind of extras?  Maybe some Misha and Sasha desktop wallpapers, maybe something, I don’t know.  I just feel like they really skimped in terms of DVD extras.

As far as the movie goes, I’m happy there.  My only real complaint in terms of quality of the overall DVD is the annoying repeated audio loop from the DVD menus.   It’s the same 5 second loop repeated over and over and over again.  Who the hell thought that would be a good idea?  A moan or two is nice, but the same 5 second moan repeated over and over and over, not so much.

In conclusion — Despite the fact that this is a movie from 2003, it was still a good watch some 7 years later.  The twins are extremely hot.  The movie left me wanting to get to know more about them and see even more of their work.  Scenes from the movie is available to download just click on the box cover above to go directly to the link.

Review for Meggan Does Malibu

Movie Description: Meggan and her best friend are on their last fling to California from their home town in Ohio. It’s their last chance for fun before settling down in the heartland. They meets an adventurous, romantic Bohemian artist, a California original, and with her comes a … morehost of sexy seaside men…and suddenly all the old rules seem not to apply. Adult’s most awarded director, Paul Thomas, brings together Malibu, Meggan, threeways and facials, in a sand, sun and sex spectacular, Meggan Does Malibu. It’s a tale told as only Paul Thomas can, from the people who do sex and story best…Vivid. Starring Meggan Mallone, Gianna Lynn, Holly West, Jennifer Dark, Rocco Reed, Alan Stafford, Trent Tesoro, and Joey Brass. This movie is available on DVD.

Hello my name is Mandee and well this is officially my first movie review for the Luke Ford website.   I will be posting several movie reviews for you in the future so I hope you find them helpful.

The first scene starts off with Meggan Mallone walking around in jean shorts and a pink polka dot bikini top. She meets up with a friend of hers and they get a stranger to take their photo together as if they were tourists.  Turns out the two are supposed to be from Ohio there in California for a vacation.

Eventually they make their way to the beach and again run into the guy who took their picture earlier. He helps them in their pursuit of finding some celebrities. They find their way onto his boat and as her friend goes to take a phone call Meggan and the stranger, played by Rocco Reed to start to make out. Making out leads to fucking in just about every part of his boat house.   These two are great together.  It’s a very good scene in terms of sexual energy and passion.

In the next scene we see Gianna Lynn playing with her breasts, then heads to the couch to see her fiance.  She misses him and she can’t wait to have sex with him.  As he starts to eat her pussy you notice right away she didn’t shave that day. With a day or so worth of growth on her pussy it gives it a very unusually dark look. It’s hard to explain how it looks other than to say it looks weird. I felt sorry for the dude trying to eat her pussy. You know that fucking stubble didn’t feel good.

Next Gianna Lynn got face fucked then they made their way to the bed and she rode his cock. This scene was strangely not Paul Thomas like. The energy just wasn’t there at all. Normally he gets more out of her performers but this time it just looked so strangely forced. She was trying to hard and the guy was just phoning it in. Trent Tesoro didn’t have much chemistry with Gianna Lynn at all.  While they were fucking thy got interrupted. It seems the maid came in to clean the room. As she said she would come back later he told her that was okay. Instead he threw her on the couch and started fucking her. Her seemed far more into Holly West than he did the last girl.  Soon Gianna Lynn joined the two and it made for a great threesome. The scene got much better when Holly West joined the mix.  The scene ended rather strangely. While her man was still fucking the maid, she quickly jumped out of bed, put on her clothes, grabbed her suitcase and took off. The other two didn’t seem to notice or case or care that the chick took off.

In the next scene she hooks up with not one, but two men, neither of which were her fiance. The two men she hooks up with this time are Alan Stafford and Joey Brass. There seems to be very little reason as to why she decided to go off and fuck two other guys when her fiance was in town, other than “some unfinished business” but this is a porno so really do you need a reason to fuck?  Gianna Lynn is more sexually aggressive than most females so pairing her with the right men is important. You can really see the difference from the last scene and the sex just comes off much hotter. Again the only real problem I have with her is that the bitch really needs to shave her fucking pussy. That shot looks so fucking nasty because, all black and seriously, someone buy the bitch a fucking razor already.

At the end of the scene both the men unload on her nice, big titties.  That was pretty hot.

In the next scene it’s time for everyone to go back to Ohio or Idaho, wherever they are from.  Meggan Mallone reveals she is going to stay in California and move in with the guy she fucked the other day. In this part of the movie Meggan and Gianna Lynn’s fiance have a heated exchange of words where basically he calls her a slut for just hooking up and moving in with some random guy.  What is interesting about this scene is that in real life Meggan Mallone was in a relationship with Trent.  But by the way those two went at each other, you wouldn’t have guessed it.  Guess it’s true what they said about Paul Thomas and his ability to bring out the best in any porn actress.

Meggan Mallone heads over to her new place and it is there she meets his crazy ex-girlfriend played by Jennifer Dark.  The three seem to get along rather well and that of course leads to a great threeway that ends in him unloading on their faces and in their mouths.

In all the movie was about an hour and 34 minutes long but still unusual to have only 4 scenes. Most movies today have 5 sex scenes in that same time period, but this was had some rather long sex so in all the movie only included the 4 scenes.

The movie ends and Meggan going on her way. thinking about her time in Malibu and moving into her own apartment which interestingly enough just so happens to have been the same location that they shot Meggan and Hanna Love Manuel.
At the very end you get a shot of Paul Thomas on the Pier in a cameo.

On a strange note, the movie credits say it was written and directed by Chuck Lords, yet most sources of information say it was directed by Paul Thomas. Since Paul Thomas made the non-sex cameo at the end of the movie that would make sense. So I did some digging and it turns out Chuck Lords is just another name Paul Thomas uses to attach his name to projects he isn’t particularly proud of.
Overall I would say if you are a fan of Meggan Mallone then this movie is a must have. She looks hot, fucks great and has two sex scenes in the movie.

This movie is available on DVD