YA BABY, SPRING BREAK!!

Six Busted in Wet T-Shirt Contest

from WJHG, Fl.

Bay County sheriff’s deputies made their first lewd and lascivious arrests of spring break.

It started with a wet t-shirt contest that took place Tuesday night at Hammerhead Fred’s bar on Thomas Drive.

Investigators say the male DJs and customers used alcohol to help encourage the female participants to remove the t-shirts, expose themselves, and allow the audience to fondle them and bite their breasts.

Capt. Rickie Ramie of the BCSO Special Investigations Unit explained, “They had taken a contest and basically there were females up there performing oral sex on one another, that was the original complaint. And we sent in a couple of investigators in at the time to see what was taking place. Inside they saw, certainly things that would be classified as violations of the law."

Deputies arrested six people. Thirty-two-year-old Charles Ray Bunch of Panama City is accused of solicitation for lewd and lascivious conduct by the contestants. Seventeen-year-old Jacqucin Strong of Orange Beach, Alabama was arrested on nudity and indecent conduct.

Also charged were: Louis Adrian Green, 34, of Essixville, Michigan, Christopher Scott, 21 of Saginaw, Michigan, Dianna Chang , 23 of Naperville, Illinois, and an Illinois man was charged with resisting an officer without violence.

IT SMELLS LIKE PISS IN HERE!!

Signs of meth production

from the Duluth News Tribune

• A strong odor in or around the home that resembles cat urine, because ammonia is used to make meth.

• Odd hours of tenants. Are they awake all day and night?

• Do people come and go on frequent basis for short periods of time?

• Lots of cash lying around, but no one has a job.

• Are tenants’ appearances filthy? Hair greasy? Teeth rotting? One user’s T-shirt was constantly yellow and the chemicals secreted with his sweat burned holes in the fabric.

PUPILS SEE MISS IN SEX ROMP

Cops called in after teacher’s mobile is stolen from school
By Brian Mccartney, The Daily Record

A WOMAN teacher’s mobile phone sex movie is being passed around her pupils.

Her raunchy antics have been doing the rounds since her phone was stolen from a classroom.

And the full-frontal footage – which shows the teacher engaged in a sex act – is now being widely distributed among camera-phone and email users.

The risque 13-second clip shows the teacher wearing nothing but her spectacles and reclining naked on a purple sheet, her head resting on pillows.

The pouting, dark-haired teacher proceeds to fondle herself.

The footage has been widely circulated in the last few days following the theft of a phone from an unattended classroom at a school in Dundee.

REALITY PLAY

For this San Marcos sex-doll maker, it’s about quality

by Paul Hormick, San Diego City Beat

Eric Schlosser, in his recent book Reefer Madness, claims San Diego is one of America’s finest cities for producing pornography. Whatever it may be—softcore, hardcore, fetish porn, gay porn—it’s made here, and made here in spades. Maybe it’s the sun or the large military presence; whatever the reason, San Diego has some sort of erotic vibe that goes past what you might find in the rest of the country. And maybe that’s why RealDoll, the 21st-century version of the blow-up doll, or what’s called a sex doll, makes its home here.

I recently toured RealDoll’s headquarters and factory, an exceptionally nondescript building in San Marcos with no sign—not even a decal on a window—that might clue you in to what the company is or what is manufactured within. In the front office, Shelly Couture, a tall, friendly blonde with pretty blue eyes, greets me as my guide. She’s the spokesperson for the company, and before advancing past the front office, she photocopies my driver’s license.

I ask about photocopying visitors’ licenses and their low-profile, Cheney-esque undisclosed location. Is it because they’re afraid that someone on a moral crusade might vandalize their business? Couture assures me that the security is for proprietary reasons. “There are all sorts of people in Japan and China who are trying to steal what we do,” she says.

We walk back to a small room. If Madame Tussauds had an X-rated section, it would look something like this. Three dolls are in various stages of undress in Frederick’s of Hollywood-style lingerie. The fourth doll hangs from a metal stand and is dressed in jeans and a halter. The other dolls look normally proportioned, but the one in jeans has breasts the size of the Louisiana Purchase. She also has the large eyes and other features characteristic of anime, the Japanese style of cartoon and animation.

“See, she’s fully articulated,” says Couture, as she moves the doll’s arm up and down. I grab the arm to see for myself. The feeling is somewhat like flesh, albeit cool. Although the doll has a metal frame, there is no feeling of bone, the firmness that people have around their wrists and shoulders. Squeezing the arm is like squeezing silicon rubber, which makes sense because, well, that’s what the dolls are made of. I move the arm, and it does indeed move in a fashion of a real human arm.

“Of course, we recommend warming the dolls before use. We suggest using a heated blanket. And to warm things up down there,” Couture says, gesturing toward the doll’s crotch, “we suggest a warm-water douche.”

The dolls aren’t made like mannequins, with the limbs and head added to a torso. Instead, the dolls come from a single pouring of silicon rubber over a steel “skeleton,” the skullcap and face being the only main features of the doll added later. They therefore have no seams or breaks at the joints; the rubber remains smooth, like real skin.

On display above the anime doll is a row of doll faces, all of them with an expression of blank wonder. With their jaws lowered and mouths open in an “O,” it’s as if they’re a chorus ready to sing the first line to “Oklahoma.” The RealDoll website claims that the orifices are designed to produce suction, the mouth giving the most suction of all, when used.

“The dolls come with 16 faces and 10 body types, with skin tone going from my complexion,” Couture says, pointing to the fair skin under her blonde locks, “to African-American. We’re the only manufacturer with this kind of variety. There are other manufacturers of dolls like these, but each company will only manufacture one kind of doll.”

After choosing the features and body type, customers sometimes ask for additional customization. “We can add permanent makeup, if you like,” says Couture. “But a lot of people like to do that for themselves. It’s part of the process.”

One customization possibility is making the dolls to resemble famous humans or a person—such as a girlfriend or wife—a customer knows. “Of course, we cannot make an exact replica, for legal reasons.” Couture says. “If it’s someone that the customer knows, we get permission from that person or that person’s estate.” She then lists some names of pinup and porn stars that have been requested to be made into dolls.

Although I have a hard time thinking of the subject coming up in dinner conversation, Couture says most of the marketing of RealDoll is by word-of-mouth. “Our market is mostly 35- to 65-year-old men with disposable incomes. One customer has bought every [type of] doll we make.”

But it’s not only men who buy the dolls. Some couples have bought dolls, and some women have bought them for their husbands and boyfriends. “One woman came to us with her tax return and, knowing that she was going to be away for a long time, bought one for her husband so he wouldn’t be fooling around on her.” She adds that the dolls can be used for more than sexual gratification. “You can cuddle up next to it instead of a body pillow. It becomes part of a lifestyle.

“Some of the men who have bought our dolls are, well, vertically challenged,” Couture says, “It’s hard enough being a man in this world, but just think how hard it is for a short man.” Other customers have been burn victims or others who have become disfigured.

The dolls are sold all over the world, half of which are sold here in the U.S. The other major markets are Japan, the U.K. and Germany.

Couture walks me down to the lower floor of the building where the dolls are made. At the landing, immediately to my left, is a line of dolls suspended from a moving rack, like what you might see in a slaughterhouse. The dolls are headless, but the torsos look real enough to make the view a little disconcerting. The variations of the doll torsos take them from 5-foot-1 to 5-foot-10 and from 62 to 115 pounds. The cup sizes for the breasts on the dolls range from A to triple F.

RealDoll started with Matt McMullen, a sculptor by trade. He wanted realistic human figures that could hold a pose. All of the torsos start out as clay sculptures made by McMullen. After he sculpts a doll, a mold is formed around the clay figure. When the mold is separated from the figure, the original artwork is destroyed in the process. In one section of the production floor, the molds lay open, some of them holding the metal “skeletons” in them. When the dolls are first taken out of the molds, the silicon rubber is still pliable and a little sticky. “This is when we affix the pubic hair,” Couture says, “when the hair will naturally affix itself to the body.” Small tufts of synthetic hair lie between the legs of the dolls farther down the line. For the dolls’ heads, wigs of synthetic hair are attached.

Couture walks me over to a corner of the room to a shelf holding the only other body parts added to the dolls. Rows of silicon teeth, tongues and labia lay in front of me. Couture tells me that there are several different labia, but I don’t examine them closely enough to notice. I pick up one, and it feels sort of like a gummy bear.

Every bit of a RealDoll is made at this San Marcos facility, and there are no plans to move production to Mexico or China. Couture believes the quality of the dolls would suffer if they moved production offshore. “We are the Rolls Royce of this industry,” she says. “It’s not all about the buck. If the quality goes out, I’m gone.”

She’s fairly emphatic when she says this, adding that RealDoll is recognized for its quality and is a member of the Better Business Bureau.

It takes about 90 hours of labor to make a doll, and the factory turns out about one doll a day. Of course, if you’re buying a Rolls Royce, they don’t come cheap. The dolls sell for $6,499. Any additional customization costs more. As their website will tell you, you can’t get a RealDoll at any retail outlet, even some of your finer adult bookstores. They are sold directly from RealDoll from online orders. In addition to the 13-page care guide, RealDoll provides after-sales support for things like minor repairs to the silicon rubber.

Customers also get an accessories kit that includes antibacterial soap.

LESBIAN COUPLE CONVICTED IN HORRIFIC MURDER

Four-year-old Jandre Botha refused to call his mother’s lesbian lover "daddy" – and paid with his life.

from iol.co.za

Jandre’s father, Jan Botha, was in the Vereeniging regional court’s public gallery on Wednesday when his former wife, Hanelie Botha, 31, and her partner, Engeline de Nysschen, 33, were found guilty of the gruesome murder of his son.

Guilty: Engeline De Nysschen has been found guilty of murder. Photo: The MercuryHe sat in court holding the hands of his fiancée, Yolanda Deysel, and listened attentively to magistrate Rita Willemse, who, in her judgment, accepted evidence that among the reasons that led to Jandre’s brutal ordeal was his refusal to call De Nysschen "daddy".

The court had heard evidence from Lydia Nkomo and her daughter Aletta Lesiba, who worked for the couple in their tuckshop, that De Nysschen had viciously assaulted Jandre while demanding that he must call her "daddy".

Both testified that while Jandre was assaulted, his mother failed to intervene or protect him. Evidence showed he had sustained horrific injuries, including a fractured skull and brain damage, as well as broken legs, collarbone, hands and pelvis.

The court accepted the evidence of Professor Mohammed Dada, a trauma expert, who said the boy’s injuries were similar to those of a person who had fallen from a double-storey building.

Delivering judgment, Willemse acknowledged there was no substantial evidence linking Hanelie to the assaults, but said she was equally guilty of murder for failing in her legal duty to protect her child against abuse and violation.

The court found she had lied to Dr Elna Gibson, one of the medical doctors who treated Jandre, by saying the boy obtained his injuries after he had slipped in the bath.

The court ruled that she had lied to protect De Nysschen. The doctors who had examined Jandre dismissed the pair’s version that he had slipped in the bath. They said excessive force was required to inflict the kind of fatal injuries sustained by Jandre.

Convicting the two, Willemse dismissed their version and said there was substantial medical evidence before her about the nature of the injuries suffered by Jandre.

"I accept the evidence of the medical personnel who are experts in their fields. There were substantial documents placed before me. Most of them have medical experience which spans over a period of 15 years.

"All of them have dismissed the version of the accused and were unanimous that the deceased’s injuries were inflicted over a period of time.


Guilty: Hanelie Botha, Engeline’s lesbian partner, has also been found guilty. Photo: The Mercury"It is unthinkable that the mother of the child could not have known about these fatal injuries. The deceased also had broken legs, and his mother should have been aware of this."

The magistrate criticised Hanelie for failing to report Jandre’s abuse at the hands of her lover to the social workers monitoring Jandre’s progress, after she had gained custody of him during a lengthy court battle with her ex-husband. She also failed to report the abuse to her ex-husband.

The boy’s father became aware of Jandre’s abuse only on the day of his death, June 12, 2003. De Nysschen contacted him and said Jandre had fallen earlier in the day and had died.

Willemse criticised Hanelie’s fitness to be a mother, saying her parents later approached her ex-husband and gave him financial help to fight for the custody of his child.

Rebuking Hanelie, Willemse said: "Hanelie was not helpless. She was well aware of Engeline’s violent outburst.

"She could have called the child’s father for help but she failed to do so. She did nothing to protect her own child."

The magistrate labelled Engeline a liar and a hopeless witness who had contradicted herself in testimony.

Hanelie and De Nysschen were further convicted of assault with intent to do grievous bodily harm and child neglect for failing to provide or seek treatment for Jandre’s limb fractures.

The case was postponed until June 26 for a pre-sentencing report.

WHAT UP DAWG??? OR POODLE

Officials seek perpetrator in rape of poodle
from the Associated Press

PHOENIX A poodle is recovering today after its owner found her covered in feces and blood in the backyard of her northeast Phoenix home.

Arizona Humane Society spokeswoman Angela Stringfellow says the eight-pound, five-year-old toy poodle had been raped and sodomized by a human.

The dog went missing last night. Its owner, 43-year-old Mary Robertson, and her friends combed the area in search of the poodle.

Roberston says when they stopped searching, someone threw the dog into the backyard. The dog, named Sassy, ran into the home through the doggy door.

Stringfellow says there was severe tearing on the dog’s vulva and anus. She says Sassy will survive but will never be the same.

The Humane Society is offering a five-thousand-dollar reward for any information that leads to the arrest of whoever committed this heinous crime. Anyone with tips can call 480-WITNESS.

Phoenix police Sergeant Andy Hill says detectives are investigating the incident. He says the one or more culprits would face charges of animal cruelty. That’s a felony.

DAD BOILED IN FETISH SUIT

KINKY Robert Garnett boiled to death after snorting a potentially lethal dose of cocaine and putting on a rubber suit, an inquest heard yesterday.

By Don Mackay, from the Mirrod.co.uk 

His body temperature soared, causing his brain to swell as he wore a fetishist-style gimp outfit seen in the film Pulp Fiction.

The 35-year-old McDonald’s burger bar manager – a separated dad of one – was found in his bedroom after relatives had reported him missing.

Medical experts said Mr Garnett, of Lambeth, South London. had hyperthermia leading to a build-up of brain fluid.

Pathologist Dr Peter Jerreat told the hearing at Southwark: “The rubber clothing caused excessive overheating.

“The toxicology reports revealed a potentially fatal level of cocaine.

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“The contributory factor to his death was the presence of cocaine.”

Verdict: Accident.

 

CINDY CRAWFORD LAUNCHES OFFICIAL WEBSITE

Cindy Crawford On The Web, ClubCindyCrawford Launches. 

The Official Website of Cindy CrawfordPorn Valley – The ClubHardcore Network, which launched last month with its’ first website www.clubtaylorrain.com, has launched its’ next website www.clubcindycrawford.com.

ClubCindyCrawford.com is the Official Website of blonde porn goddess Cindy Crawford. The one time Jill Kelly contract star has found a home on the web. From her journal on ClubCindyCrawford, "I’m so happy to finally have an official site that really represents me. It’s classy, elegant and nasty all in one."  Cindy is off and running already. "I’m having so much fun already. I get to write in my journal, have live one on one chats with my fans in my chat area. Oh ya, and I’m adding all the content to my website. I update the site daily and I add photos and videos each week of me and other hot pornstars. I love this!!!"  

Why now? Why ClubHardcore? Cindy adds, "I’ve dabbled on the web now and then but never found my place with a website. Now I have. I get to partner up with Kelly Erikson who runs the ClubHardcore.tv website, so we get to work together and spend time together. ClubTaylorRain is part of the network and I saw her site first. I like the way it’s done. The focus is on the one girl, BUT they add so much bonus content that it will do really well to keep members. For every one photoset of me, there’s 100 of other top pornstars and that’s important to keeping members."

Cindy’s enthusiasm has already begun to pay off, as traffic to her site continues to sky rocket.. "I’m just so happy, because I can come home from a day on set and start posting on my journal, or if I have any energy left, I can turn my camera on and start having a live chat with people who are members on my site. Sometimes when I’m bored, I’ll take a shower, put on my makeup and something really sexy, turn my camera on and just give the people logged in a show they’ll never forget. This is what I always wanted." 

Cindy Crawford at ClubTaylorRain.comCindy’s website also includes a Personal Store where she sells clothing, autographed photos, polaroids and videos, plus she takes requests to make Custom Videos. Live Chat, Live Video, Schedule and Appearances, Video On Demand, Photo Galleries, Bonus Photo Galleries of hundreds of Pornstars, Video Clips, Bonus Video Clips of hundreds of Pornstars, Full Movies for download and streaming. Cindy answers all her email for fans and she schedules one on one chats via Live Video.

 

ClubCindyCrawford has been added to the CashOnClick affiliate program of ClubHardcore, so webmasters can start promoting now. Webmasters make 50% on all signups AND for the life of the membership. New features are being added to the cashonclick program weekly, such as Hosted Galleries, Free Content for TGP’s, Banners

BUT WOULD YOU FUCK EVA THIS AFTERNOON?

Someone Writes Fayner’s Myspace page:

Fucking funny shit.Do you by any chance know Sam Stern?
That fucker was a trip.

I emailed him for like 2 years……..when he had his website Jewishcheerleaders.com.

Then we met at some tit club in LA…..Clowns.

We fucked a few of the girls at the club that night…..stayed up a couple of days…….and then I went back to San Diego.

Last I heard he was in Brazil?
You know?

All I know is I want to fuck Eva Angelina this morning.
ha

 

 

 

 

 

Fayner Says: Somehow I find it strange that a man has spent two years searching for another man even after believing he’s in Brazil (possibly) fucking HIV positive transsexuals.

Sweet.

But I forgive you since you stated your intentions towards the beautiful Eva.

Now go away. 

GUESS WHERE SHE’S HIDING THE WHISKEY BOTTLE?

SEE MORE KELLY ERIKSON AT HER MYSPACE PAGE FOUND HERE 
or at her official website www.clubhardcore.tv
Yo!
As you’re havin’ fun in the sun tell that big tittie blonde friend of yours (Kelly Erikson)  Alex Zander says hello! And I need a 2006 pic of her with a bottle of whiskey between those pillows.

And as always, I love your updates. Fucking makes my day every day.

Let me know if you want to come to Chicago and play. Jimmy Mofo is coming for Glamourtcon. I’d love to be your host.

Later sickies
SINcerely yours
Alex “fucking” Zander  M K MAGAZINE


Fayner Says:
Can you find the hidden bottle of booze in this picture of Kelly? Look hard and you’ll find it.

Is my trip to Chicago on your dime, ’cause if it is you know I’m there.