Fayner Posts: 11 a.m. on a Thursday.

Leaving the park TR brings her dogs to, not designated as a “dog” park. But we go anyway.

5 dogs, two stoned adults.

A car full of barking dogs exits the parking lot. Smokie the pit bull chases after it, igniting TR to scream: “Fayner! Get my fucking dog!”

But Smokie won’t listen, continues chasing car. People jump into their cars in fear of this ferocious pit bull.

I drop my grape soda, begin chasing Smokie who is chasing the car that is unaware there is a killer dog chasing after it. The car, plus Smokie, take the turn onto the main street, out of my view. Bystanders yell to the car to stop. It doesn’t. My new dog Sara the bloodhound – yeah, I named both my dogs after Fleetwood Mac songs, how Gay is that? – I discover is chasing me chase Smokie chase the car. It’s not a kosher scene for me.

“Fayner! Fayner! Fayner!” TR screams. “Get my dog!”

I take the corner and see Smokie standing by the side of the main street sniffing a tree. I run up to her and bash her in the head with my fist, kick her numerous times and then pick her up by her scruff and carry her crying back to the parking lot. A lady with a baby strapped to her chest is holding Sara about half-way down the parking lot. She is not pleased, mostly because TR sees that I have Smokie and begins laughing.

“Tell your girlfriend this is not funny,” that lady says to me.

“She is not my girlfriend!” I shoot back.

TR continues laughing, to herself.

“Hey!” the lady screams to TR, “this is not a joke! Keep your dog on a leash!”

“My dogs are great!” TR blasts back. “They don’t need a leash!”

[They do.]

“Obviously they do!” the lady barked. “There are children walking around and you have your crazy pit bull without a collar or leash running rampant! YOu should be ashamed!”

“Hey, fuck you!” TR yells back, as I push her into her Escalade and slam the door behind her.

“Just go,” I say to her. “You’ve got nothing. The lady is right. You are wrong. Just go.”

And go TR did, fast through the parking lot past the lady with the baby strapped to her chest and out into the main street where she floored it and sped away.

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