MAX HARDCORE’S CAT DIES MYSTERIOUSLY AS TRIAL APPROACHES

Fayner Posts: In what the Feds are calling "a devestating blow" to their case against sometime pornographer/ sometime just gross man, Max Hardcore, it has been revealed this morning that Max’s cat – the same cat Max is being charged with having her claws too long – has been found hanging from a rope in her family’s summer home outside of Tahoe. She was there preparing for the big court case against her and Max for her claws being too long.

A note lay beside the dead, swinging corpse on a nearby table stating she was "too weak, too prideful to go against my daddy Max in court…would never air out his dirty laundry…this is a better path for me."

Max could not be reached for comment.

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