Fayner Posts: Max Hardcore was relieved this morning, as a judge ruled his obscenity charge was a "big fucking joke!" but instead of just letting the "pornographer" walk out of the courthouse, the Fed’s instead charged Hardcore with not having his cat declawed, which, under California Law 467-B states that a cat’s claw must be shorter than 3 inches. Max’s cat, Pee Breath, has, according to the Fed’s claim, "claw’s exceeding the State’s guidelines."
"Pee Breath means more to me than all the young girls I’ve made to look even younger!" Max yelled from the court’s stairs. "Fuck the damn law! My constitutional right as an American is to be able to have my cat’s claws as long as I wish as long as it remains an indoor cat!"
The Fed’s laughed at Max’s defense. "Are you kidding me? The man’s cat had claws 6 inches longer than allowed. The guy is going down! I can’t wait to see what they do to a cat abuser in prison! The guy is fucked."
