Fayner Posts: Lately I’ve been engulfed in emails demanding my ever-so valued opinion regarding the recent Devinn Lane flick from Shane’s World in which “straight” porno dudes get dildo-fucked in the pooper by chicks. I don’t know why my thoughts should matter here, not sure what I can say that will make a difference one way or another but I feel I owe it to those who seek my eloquent perspective to at least comment on this.
A lot has been said regarding Kurt Lockwood’s involvement in this movie. A lot. And not necessarily because people feel the act of getting butt-blasted by a chick means he is gay; mostly for the fact that Kurt has for years been steadfast in his assertion that he is not gay, was never gay and will no be gay a week after Stalin’s birthday.
(Frankly, I don’t much care if Kurt is gay or not. We’ve had our beef regarding this years ago and that is that. I ain’t about to rehash old shit for the sake of calling him a flamer for what transpired that day.)
My personal opinion is that a man who takes anything up his shitter has issues with his sexuality, whether it be from a big burly trucker named Carl, two hot chicks wielding slicked-up strap-on toys or Jason Seacrest. Flat-out gay I can’t say, but history states that any man who covets tushy-love ain’t 100% straight no matter what. (Who am I to challenge history?) And having issues with your sexuality don’t mean nothing other than having issues with your sexuality. In this country we respect the choices of others, whether popular or not.
(It has been rumored for years that the ultimate Man’s Man Hugh Hefner of Playboy fame enjoys jerking off to gay porno while his bunnies fool around with each other nearby. Is he gay, or just bored from the hundreds – probably thousands – of chicks he’s bedded over the years and looking for a new kick? Hard to say…
All I know is the one time a chick has inserted a finger into my crapper – back in college, a mohawked punker chick with a pet rat on her shoulder while she blew me – I felt a little tingle of gayness deep down in my gut. I also felt a sense of adventure, the new car smell if you will, ‘cause it was a variation on my normal antics. I can imagine being someone like Mark Davis and crave something more than what I’ve done thousands of times before (not to say he’s ever done anything like this). Not to say I’d cross the line Lockwood and the others did, but I can see hetero sex becoming a tad bland after boning so many chicks over the years. Lucky for me and my virgin ass I’ve yet to cross that line.
Enough with Lockwood. What I’m asking is what about Ryan Knox?
Knox, who also got his rusty sheriff’s badge poked in Devinn’s movie, is hereby assumed by many to be flat-out queer, including us here at Lukeford.com. He’s still too new and young to be bored by vanilla sex with women, therefore tagging him a card-carrying homosexual. And we say this not because he found himself trying to fuck Fayner’s sister after being forewarned to stay away from her with threats of ruining what he has of a career. We pass this judgment not because he continued to be in contact with Fayner’s sister via email while pestering her to try and convince Fayner to hire him on a shoot.
We say this because Knox let a chick penetrate his asshole with a large dildo on film for shitty pay.
And that’s all I got to say about that.