“No facials, no ATM and no black guys!”
Fayner Posts: My little girl Sara Rib-Eye (seen above) is on her way to becoming a bonafide movie star. She’s met with a trainer and an agent, and they both have high hopes for my sweet little bloodhound. It’s about time, ’cause this dog has made me broke with all the chocolate Bon Bons she eats. It’s payback time.
So I’m sitting there talking to the agent and she’s going over all the pay rates for all the different jobs in different mediums. Just like a porn chick.
When she was saying “extra work pays $150 to $250 a day” I was hearing “footjobs and handjobs pay $150 to $250 a day.”
When she was saying “principle work without name credit pays $500 to $750 a day” I was hearing “gangbangs and orgies and Violation of…..pay $500 to $750 a day.”
When she was saying “principle work with credit pays $1,000 a day” I was hearing “boy-girl anal pays $1,000 a day.”
When she was saying “movie star roles pay up to $2,000 a day” I was hearing “1st time anal, 1st time interacial, 1st DP pays $2,000 a day.”
I don’t know, I got a kick out of it. But what was priceless was when the agent asked me if I’ve been on a movie set and I told her I “used” to work in porn, she looked down and said “okay, ew, that’s gross.”