A SWING AND A MISS FOR CASSIDEY

Fayner Posts: Hey, it was a bold move.I mean, we gotta hand it to the cute-as-a-button Cassidey for atleast attempting to do something so out of character – and so, how should I say this, out of color) as this, right?

I’m talking about, of course, the casting call for a feature film about the life of former TLC star Lisa “Left Eye” Lopez in which the darling Cassidey auditioned for.

“Seriously,” Cassidey tells me afterwards, “I was sitting at home really, really baked, right, and this program comes on about this chick named Lisa “Left Eye” Lopez from TLC who died in a car crash. And I was like, ‘Hey! I used to be called “Left Eye” too ’cause my left eye is fake!’ and that got me thinking about the passion I could put into that role if only given the chance!”

“How did it go?” I ask her. “Did the fact that you’re not black hurt you?”

“I don’t think so,” she says. “I believe that if I could sing, that part would be mine. No doubt. I mean, c’mon, who would bring more emotion to the part of Left Eye than someone who truly knew her pain?”

“You do know she wasn’t missing her left eye, right?”

Silence.

She hangs up.

No one has seen her since.

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