Fayner Posts: Taylor called me this morning.
“I got some bad news, dawg,” she said between hits from a pipe.
“Oh, God, when do I have to have my shit out of the house?”
“What? No! This is much, much worse. For you, though, not me. Ha!”
“What is it?!”
“My sister’s boyfriend asked her to marry him last night.”
“What now?”
“Yeah, my sister is getting married!”
I was not pleased. You see, ever since I laid eyes on TR’s little sister, I’ve been like putty in her hands. Something about that full, soft rack of hers made me want them for myself. But to no avail, as she finds me gross. So gross, its rumored, that she was offered a new car if she fucked me and she declined. I guess I must be pretty gross.
I don’t think I can write anything more today, as my tears make it too difficult to concentrate.
Boo hoo.