Fayner Posts: I was at my local Rite Aid just minding my own damn business, scouring the sunglasses rack for a decent pair of $8 shades. Nothing. Figures.

But they did have my favorite afro pick, so I decided to grab one just in case. While waiting in line, I heard a familiar voice behind me. So I turned. It was Ashley BLue. I hadn’t seen her in a long, long time.

“Oh, hey Fayner,” Ashley said, not really paying much attention to anything but the National Enquirer plastered to her face. “Can you believe this? The UFOs are coming! Look, it says it right here! They’re coming!”

About to try and figure just what was wrong with Ashley, my mind wonders off as I notice what is in her arms: a boatload of pregancy tests.

“Hey, Ashley, are you pregnant?”

She immediately drops the white-trash rag, flustered. “Ah, no, ah, they’re for my roommate.”

“Really. Cool.”

“Yeah Really, why would you think otherwise? Hey, don’t go writing on your site that I’m fucking pregnant, okay? ‘Cause I’m not! Okay?”

Leave a Reply