Well, it’s official. The short list of nominees for the FAME awards was announced yesterday and I didn’t make the "fan" cut. Apparently not enough of you fuckers bothered to heed my call for votes. Either that or the Adam and Eve sponsored show is a farce. Or the system was rigged somehow by an outsider. Or maybe the fans didn’t really like my movie, as opposed to say, Bad News Bitches.
I guess there is no accounting for taste.
They’ll probably just give everything to Digital Playground and Pirates anyway, again, but in the interest of promoting the absurd, I hope they give BEST FEATURE to AMA’s Bad News Bitches, which I am assured is a true quality feature. All jest aside I really do love Nautica Thorn.
The worst part is that the announcement serves as a kind of a final bell for the movie PRISONER as far as I am concerned.
Don’t get me wrong. PRISONER is an amazing movie and I am really proud of how well it turned out. It’s just that it got buried by bigger companies with marketing campaigns who understand the value of publicity. METRO never really promoted the title, aside from a few press releases and a private media screening I threw together right before the show. I mean, Keith O’Connor from DEFIANCE, the guy who helped green light the PRISONER project, but who is now at odds with METRO, has done more to promote the title than METRO has, throwing out praise for the movie left and right on Luke Ford Dot Com. What the fuck does that say?
It says that someone fucked up, let a fantastic opportunity slip through their fingers, that some cheese dick really dropped the ball, and that cheese dick goes by the name of Noel Bloom.
When Noel Bloom was the GM for METRO, or as we liked to call him, Captain Jacuzzi, he allowed Jeff Mullen and ALL MEDIA PLAY to co-sponsor Nick Andrew’s screening party for DARK ANGELS 2 while we were going head to head with the same title in the AVN Nominations. Who does that? When in the history of porn have you ever heard of a company sponsoring their competitors screening party? I don’t recall it happening in the near decade I’ve been around. I can tell you that you’ll never see WICKED or VIVID’s names added to a NEW SENSATIONS screening party in this lifetime.
Maybe it’s because Noel loved to hit the sauce early in the day nearly as much as he loved to tell us all stories of how he invented the Beta-Max. Do they let you hit the scotch like that at Sex Z Pictures, Mr. Bloom? Maybe it’s because his memory isn’t what it used to be, by his own confession, and he often takes too much on his plate to handle, then panics and leaves everyone around him hanging.
He sure did a bang up job of taking care of me and promoting PRISONER during the AVN show this year. Oh let me tell you. While Rob Rotten was signing pictures of himself most of the people in the booth with us had no clue who I was, and vice versa. And let’s just say that Pam and Noel weren’t too busy trying to promote the flick or set up any interviews while I was there. I spent most of my time floating around Club Jenna’s booth, where I was treated like family despite the circus atmosphere of constant media attention.
I guess it shouldn’t have come as any surprise that Noel showed up late and didn’t walk with us to the AVN awards show, and that shortly after he accepted his lifetime achievement award he, his wife, and his son, all high tailed it out of the building, along with the wannabe publicity department from Metro, and the back East guys, stranding me and the Astrux guys before we’d even heard whether or not we’d won anything. I can’t tell you how glad I was when he got the axe.
BTW- I have to laugh. Brian Gross, Adam & Eve’s publicist and the point guy for the FAME awards, is the same guy who tried to keep me from walking the red carpet during the awards show because it was for "people that needed publicity like directors who were nominated for awards." PRISONER was nominated for 6 awards that went to Digital Playground and Wicked. Trust me when I tell you that I did it my way, even if Jessica Drake wasn’t at all interested in interviewing me for Playboy television.
When I think about what might have happened for the movie PRISONER if back when it was released we’d had Christian Mann, how it least would have gotten some real promotion, that it might have stood out a little more in the sea of million dollar features, and had its moment to shine, it makes me sad. Since then it’s been glossed over at one award show to the next, making the cut for AVN and XRCO noms, as filler for the category, while being completely ignored by Nightmoves, Empire Awards, and now FAME. I fear that WONDERLAND, which releases on May 9th, will suffer a similar fate, falling behind Michael Raven’s 5 A Wicked Feature, VISITORS, and a slew of other big-budget, feature projects from Paul Thomas and Jay Grdinia.
Don’t get me wrong. I have seen PIRATES and DARK ANGELS 2 and CAMP CUDDLY PINES POWER TOOL MASSACRE and think they are amazing. It’s not an accident that they, along with THE NEW DEVIL IN MISS JONES by PT, are getting awards. I’m not saying they don’t deserve the attention. They do. I just wish there was a separate category for movies with budgets over 100 K. You know what they say, you can wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which gets filled up first.
For those of you who haven’t seen the PRISONER, please go out and check it out. A lot of people worked really hard to make a great product, including my very talented editor. If only a few more people would have believed in it, who knows what we could have done, maybe even slain one of the Goliaths that took everything from us this year.
To all the people who bothered to write in Justine’s name and email me, who voted for me and Prisoner, and who believe in the movies I’ve poured my best into, I offer a heartfelt thanks.
To all the people that bothered to read this rant to the end, many of who have been reading this type of shit from me since the beginning, I sincerely apologize…
In the words of the Dude, sometimes you eat the bear and sometimes the bear eats you.
And for those of you still interested in checking out the 1st ever FAME awards you can learn more about them by visiting;
DCypher
For the record!!!! DCypher is one of the best feature directors to come into the adult business in a long time!!! The movies he creates are sexual, plot driven, all carry great stories and at thge same time he has that flare for adding hot and nasty sex.
The only teason Dcypher didn’t win any awards is because the other movies he was up against spent more advertising dollars with the companis handing out the awards.
Dcypher’s next movie is Wonderland released by Cal Vista and Metro Interactive, sure to be an all time classic. A movie you can sit and watch from start to finish and follow a plot, plus jirk off to 3 or 4 scenes!!! Will it win any awards? Who cares, the awards are shills anyhow! Dcypher has the respect of his peers and people in the industry, he doesn’t need a ‘bought and paid for’ statue with 3 letters on it to justify his brilliance!!!