Fayner Posts: Got my March 2006 Hustler magazine today or yesterday or the day before. I stopped checking mail on a regular basis after getting a notice for Jury Duty last week or the week before or the week before.
The new Hustler is quite good. Here are some reasons why it is good and one reason why it isn’t.
GOOD – Carmen Electra Nude! You can’t beat Carmen nude. You just can’t. Well, you ca beat your wand looking at Carmen nude. Sure you can.
GOOD – Jokes about Bush. They’re always funny, even when they’re not.
GOOD – Awesome Briana Banks pictorial! Not only does the beautiful Vivid Star look simply marvelous in her new and improved post-drug body, but that frog Laurent Sky actually did some quality work. And considering I hate the French so much, one can just guess how good the layout is if I’m complimenting him.
GOOD – Now usually the worst chick is left for the final pages of the magazine, just as the best is saved for the centerfold. Not so this time! I suppose that if it weren’t for Briana Banks also being in the issue, this absolute stunner named Autumn Bliss would hands down be the hottest chick of the month. Shit, let’s give it to her. Briana won’t mind. I even called Travis, who was jealous that I had it. He wanted his own copy. I told him I’d give him mine when I was done. He said gross. I said I had two copies. I didn’t. He believed me. I came on the pages. I’ll give it to him tomorrow. He’ll be mad. Anyone know this sexy fox and wants to set up a date with Fayner let me know at firstname.lastname@example.org
BAD – The Matt Sorum Velvet Revolver interview is just pure rubbish. He’s a hack. And old. And I heard he has hair plugs. And I’ve seen him make out with an ugly chick. And once I tracked dog shit into his house. Oh, and that whole “he stole my song and won a Grammy” thing has nothing to do with my anger…