Fayner Posts: For some reason, today TR chose in her “daily” column “What’s Hard and What’s Whack” to praise Van Halen while denouncing Pantera. Although she can’t tell when she’s hearing VH despite all my influence, I appreciate her giving props to pretty much the only thing that makes me happy anymore.

That is, until I discovered that she actually was insulting the mighty Van Halen and all that they stood for (chicks and drugs and midgets) without even knowing it.

I now correct what was incorrect…

THIS LOGO ABOVE REPRESENTS THE VAN HALEN THAT CONSISTED OF EDDIE, ALEX, MIKE AND DAVE, FROM 1978 UNTIL 1985, AND WAS REPRODUCED ON MANY NOTEBOOKS AND SCHOOL DESKS AS A TRIBUTE TO ONE OF THE WORLD’S BIGGEST ROCK BANDS EVER. SOME MORONS, LIKE ME, EVEN WENT SO FAR AS TO CARVE IT INTO THEIR ARM WITH A RAZOR BLADE IN SOME TWISTED PLEDGE OF INFECTED ALLEGENCE

(TR USED THE FOLLOWING LOGO TO ANNOUNCE VH BEING “HARD” WHICH UNKNOWINGLY GAVE PROPS TO A VERY “WHACK” ELDERLY VERSION OF THE BAND)

THIS LOGO ABOVE REPRESENTS THE VAN HALEN THAT CONSISTED OF EDDIE, ALEX, MIKE AND DAVE’S REPLACEMENT SAMMY, AND LATER SAMMY’S REPLACEMENT GARY CHERONE, FROM 1986 UNTIL TODAY, AND HAS NEVER BEEN REPRODUCED ON ANYONE’S NOTEBOOK OR SCHOOL DESK – UNLESS AS A THEFT DETERRENT OR A PRACTICAL JOKE – AS A TRIBUTE TO ONE OF THE WORLD’S BIGGEST ROCK BANDS EVER WHO FELL PREY TO GREED, EGOS AND CORPORATE ROCK.

VAN HALEN DIED IN 1985 WITH THE DEPARTURE (OR FIRING) OF DAVID LEE ROTH. SURE, THE NAME IS STILL BEING USED AFTER DAVE’S DEPARTURE, BUT EVERYONE KNOWS THAT WITH HIM ALSO DEPARTED THE OVER-THE-TOP THEATRICS, THE TOPLESS CHICKS WITH CRIMPTED AND LEGWARMERS, THE MIDGETS AND THE CLASSIC MUSIC ONLY CREATED BY SUPREME EGOMANIACS WHO DESPISE EACH OTHER.

WHEN VH CHANGED THEIR LOGO TO THE GAY 3-D ONE ABOVE, THEY PRETTY MUCH WERE SAYING THEY SURRENDERED THEIR SOULS AFTER REPLACING THE ULTIMATE CROTCHLESS LEATHER PANT WEARING FRONTMAN FOR A GUY WHO USES ONE OF THEM FAGGY HANDLESS MICROPHONES LIKE N’SYNC AND EVEN ONCE WORE A YELLOW JUMPSUIT BY CHOICE.

THE REAL VH MADE 6 ALBUMS IN 6 YEARS AND SOLD 34 MILLION COPIES IN THE U.S., NOT TO MENTION BEING THE HIGHEST PAID ROCK BAND EVER FOR A SINGLE CONCERT THAT MADE THEM $1.5 MILLION.

THE PHONEY VH MADE 6 ALBUMS IN 12 YEARS AND SOLD ONLY 18.5 MILLION, NOT TO MENTION ROYALLY SUCKING BIG TIME.