I found this the other day and I just had to LOL at it. [source]

Fifteen secret pleasure spots that are sure to make him say wow

Have you been wishing lately that your man had more mojo than no-no? More raging bull than bull that just sort of walks around really calm? You are not alone. If you and your boo have lost that sexy love monster that made you go bump in the night, then maybe you need to ramp up your foreplay from fore to eight.

What better way to reach his softer side than to awaken his most secret soft spots, those little-known erogenous zones you can’t even find in a biology book? Here is a list of your man’s all-time favorite secret pleasure spots guaranteed to drive him Mary-Todd-level crazy.

 
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1. The penis.
2. The tip of the penis.
3. The base of the penis.
4. The middle of the penis.
5. The right side of the penis.
6. The left side of the penis.
7. The northeastern side of the penis.
8. The first third of the penis
9. The second third of the penis.
10. The third third of the penis.
11. The starboard side of the penis.
12. The bottom of the penis.
13. The top of the penis.
14. The area of the penis that’s like three inches from the tip on his right like a little bit below halfway down.
15. The entire penis.