Fayner Posts: Yeah, I’m that good. I can get an interview with Jenna Jameson whenever the fuck I want. She moves around my schedule. It wasn’t always this way…
Back in my second year at the Vegas convention when I was just a young writer trying to fit in I got the chance to interview Jenna at the Vivid booth. I had been up ALL week doing blow, and it was Sunday morning around 10. Someone I was with asked me, “don’t you have to go interview Jenna right now?” as I snorted another line. I did.
So I took off down the elevator and down the hall and down another hall and another and you get the idea until I got to the Vivid booth.
This is when I approached Jenna, allegedly with cocaine all over my face, blood on the sleeves of my shirt and a glass of rum I’d been carrying around for days it seems.
I also had a video camera. Unknowing to me at the time, I had turned off the audio, so the whole interview had zero sound. I believe I got in trouble at Hustler for that one, but can’t remember as them were some dark dark days.
This time will be different, right?
FAYNER: Hi Jenna. How’s it going?
JENNA:
FAYNER: That good, huh?
JENNA
FAYNER What are your predictions for the award show?
JENNA
FAYNER Wow, that would be an upset! So, how’s Tito doing?
JENNA
FAYNER Wait, what, he stuck what in where? Is that even possible?
JENNA
FAYNER You two must have some crazy sex. I think I’ve actually heard enough from you on the subject, thanks.
JENNA
FAYNER I said no more, please. So what have you been doing in Vegas?
JENNA
FAYNER Oh, come on, Jenna! No one goes there anymore! I thought you knew better than that!
JENNA
FAYNER Well, I guess if there are three hot chicks trying to fuck you in the booth it could be an okay club. You’re right, sorry.
JENNA
FAYNER Okay, I can see the long line getting a bit upset with me for taking too much time, so I’m gonna take off. But thanks so much for this amazing interview. And good luck at the awards tomorrow night! I’m rooting for you!
JENNA
(In case you didn’t already know, Jenna ain’t signing autographs and meeting with her fans this year. Blame it on Playboy, her new boss. That is why I didn’t have her say anything in this interview; because she ain’t there. And neither am I!)