Fayner Posts: Quickly, ’cause my little cousin is in town and I gotta go see him, I was just wondering how shitty everyone thinks it would be if you were a parent of twins and they both decided to go into porn? Like, your only two kids, and they’ve both been summoned to the Dark Side.

Would you shoot yourself in the face?

Ask them for money?

See if they’d fuck you?

I don’t know what I would do. I’m not planning on having children for this same reason. But I think I’d kill myself.

What would you do?????

Let me know @ faynerpornbiz@hotmail.com

Fayner Posts: Retarded, simply retarded.

Hogwash even. Pure hogwash.

Baloney.

Smoking weed makes you crazy?

Nigga please.

A single joint of cannabis raises the risk of schizophrenia by more than 40 per cent, a disturbing study warns.

The Government-commissioned report has also found that taking the drug regularly more than doubles the risk of serious mental illness.

Overall, cannabis could be to blame for one in seven cases of schizophrenia and other life-shattering mental illness, the Lancet reports.

The grim statistics – the latest to link teenage cannabis use with mental illness in later life – come only days after Gordon Brown ordered a review of the decision to downgrade cannabis to class C, the least serious category.

The Prime Minister is said to have a ‘personal instinct’ that the change should be reversed, with more arrests and stiffer penalties for users.

Cannabis has been implicated in a string of vicious killings, including the recent stabbing of fashion designer Lucy Braham.

READ THE REST HERE

Fayner Posts: This is truly a wonderful thing. I’ve been saying someone should do this for years. I would have only I’m too lazy.

So finally, one never needs to ask that tricky question again: Is she capable of doing porn?

Well, on one really says that; this business is so full of scumbags just itching for their next buck no matter whose life is destroyed in the process.

But, now, no one has to!

This test is that good! No lie!

Introducing the Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? board game. Every porn company, every agency, every seedy old man trying to lure young boys into his basement will want to get one of these. I’m gonna get one to test the chicks I bring home from bars. One wrong answer and out you go, dumb bitch! It’ll be fun!

Fayner Posts: Fresh from their recent marriage and the birth of their new daughter, Digital Playground contract Star Teagan Presley and husband Tyler Durden were back to work this past Monday on a secret undisclosed movie.

“It wasn’t a piece of cake,” Tyler told me today over the phone. “They had me wearing a leg brace. I’d like to see you have anal sex with a leg brace on!”

“Really?”

“No, not literally.”

This marks the beginning of what will surely be a string of huge hits for the sexy babe and her buff man. We look forward to awkwardly watching them in the near future.

But just one question: Is Teagan not the hottest MILF you’ve ever seen?

Fayner Posts: I was laying in bed last night with like four drugged-up porno chicks who were all servicing me while watching television. Well, I was watching TV, they were all fighting over my dick.

I stopped by Leno for a minute, and he began talking about that story about the guy who was suing over a picture that was taken of his dick and the nickname “Italian Sausage” that came afterwards. I also mentioned that story here. But before Jay did. That makes me funnier and better than him.

Anyway, low and behold, the guy goes and says the same damn thing I did about why a man with such a great nickname would give two shits in the first place. Top-notch stuff we’re talking about here.

Does Jay Leno read LukeFord.com? Is that where he gets his rocks off, as well as most of his better content?

I think yes.

Or no.