Fayner Posts: Just got off the phone with Rick, veteran swordsman and current husband to some chick you may have heard of named Jesse Jane. She’s super purdy, I mean pretty.
Anyhow, Rick was mowing his lawn the other day out in Oklahoma where the couple resides on one of them rider-mowers. It was a hot, muggy afternoon. A cold glass of lemonade was in his hands.
Rick didn’t see the squirrel until it was too late, he tells me. Splat.
And in the wake of this Rick forgets that he is still moving and smashes into a giant Oak tree, his lemonade flying into the air and crashing to the ground.
Rick got a bump on his head and several scratches on his left knee. Although he won’t admit it, it is believed he may have damaged a testicle following the altercation with the tree.
Rick is recovering in his bed in Oklahoma. And before you start feeling badly for him or begin thinking he’s some pussy remember that his wife is one of the finest women on this whole planet and you could never get her.
He did.
You better heal up fast, Rick, ’cause if I don’t see you here in L.A. for my birthday on the 19th I think I might cry.