Fayner Posts: I hate 420 and
everything it represents. I don’t need to set a time every day in which to get even more stupider, okay.
I am doing this interview against my own free will and testiment.
What has my life become when I’m being asked to fabricate an interview with a porn star’s pit bull named Dick Bandit?
Sorry, mom.
Fayner: So, hi, Dick Bandit. I can see your asshole.
DB: Is this what I’m to expect from this interview? I have better things to do.
Fayner: Like what?
DB: Can you keep a secret?
Fayner: Not really.
DB: The I’m not gonna tell you.
Fayner: Fine, then tell me what you’d be doing if you weren’t stuck here with me doing this stupid interview?
DB: That’s easy, man. I’d be outside tearing your hammock to motherfucking schreds, that’s what. There’s nothing better if you ask me, which you did and then I answered. That’s the way it works in this part of town. Woodland Hills, motherfucker! Represent!
Fayner: So, you’re a dog.
DB: Fuck you, Jew!
Fayner: What?! I thought we were friends?!
DB: Fuck that, dog! You see, the hammock represents the white man’s oppression over the black man and the pit bull. You can’t get a table at a nice restaurant when you’re a pit bull. People cross the street when you’re a pit bull! The god-damned mailman in my neighborhood don’t taste as good as the mailman in your fancy white neighborhood, you can bet your covered ass that shit is true! Bitch!
Fayner: Listen, will you take all that back and say you’re sorry for half a porterhouse steak?
DB: Jew and white people are all really nice and a joy to be around.
Fayner: Now sit.
DB: Fuck you, Jew!