AND IF MEMORY SERVES US RIGHT, WASN’T IT BACK IN 2003 DURING THE AVN CONVENTION IN VEGAS THAT A YOUNG HUSTLER JOURNALIST NAMED FAYNER INGESTED FAR TOO MANY NARCOTICS AND FOOLISHLY CONVINCED A GIGANTIC GINA DE PALMA TO SUCK HIS DICK FOR FREE DESPITE HER QUESTIONABLE WOMANHOOD?
Fayner Says: It was the worst head I’ve ever gotten. I blame it all on Barely Legal Art Director Mike Richardi, who swore it was a good idea at 6 in the morning as we drank Bloody Mary’s at the Venetian. I remember thinking I was asking a dude for head, but I’ve never been one to turn down a blow job before that moment and Lord-Help-Me if I declined a free hummer from a Vegas hooker just because she may be a man. Anyway, I already managed to become infected with Chlamydia and gonorrhea hours before from plowing the diseased ass of one Nubian skank Cashmere, so letting a malformed Manatee gobble my pole wasn’t hurting me any more than I already was.
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The Chicago Air and Water Show attracts a lot of business to the city, but this is a new one on police.
A "porn star" who turns 49 next month apparently timed a visit to Chicago to coincide with the show, and was arrested after she unwittingly arranged with an undercover officer to perform oral sex for $1,000 at a downtown hotel, police said.
Nicole M. Hamrah was charged with prostitution and is to appear Sept. 27 in Branch 43 court, officers said. She posted her planned visit to Chicago for the Air and Water Show on the Internet, investigators said.
"She was on her farewell tour,” one officer joked. "She’ll be in Branson, Mo., shortly.”
Hamrah, of Las Vegas, may not be on the A-list of porn stars, but her videos are in stores, said Cmdr. David Sobczyk of the Chicago Police Vice Control Section. He refused to divulge her showbiz name, saying he didn’t want to help drum up customers.
"According to her, she was a recent guest on the Howard Stern show,” Sobczyk said.
Reportedly signed DVD for cop
The magazine Adult Video News wasn’t familiar with her work, but editors were surprised at her $1,000 fee.
"For oral sex?” asked AVN editor Dan Miller. "Wow.”
Hamrah, who was arrested Aug. 23, advertises herself as a "sexy porn star escort” in New York City, Barcelona and the United Kingdom, Sobczyk said.
"She actually autographed one of her DVDs for the arresting officer before she realized he was a police officer,” said Central District Capt. Joseph Vaclavik.
Authorities weren’t surprised at her age. "In today’s world, 48 is not what 48 was,” one said.